Beauty in the Ugly

Two weeks ago, I decided to have an amniocentesis performed so that my family could begin to make the necessary preparations for our baby boy. I met with two doctors that both explained the possible complications and what all the scans were showing. I have prayed for clarity and peace for several weeks and I left the office feeling like God had provided both. I knew what the tests would show. I received a call five days later that confirmed what I already knew in my heart. Our son indeed has an extra 18th chromosome in every cell in his body.

My amniotic fluid levels are high, so the doctors want to keep monitoring me pretty closely. I keep thinking that the doctor appointments will get easier. After all, we are just hashing out the same facts that we have known now for weeks. What does not get easier, however, is hearing that our baby boy will die. For the first time in this journey, we had a doctor suggest ending the pregnancy. He told us we had plenty of evidence to cling to in order to justify such actions. I know doctors are trying to prepare my husband and me for what the odds say is inevitable, but I prefer to cling to hope. I know realistically that we may not have much time with our son, but any time will be precious and beautiful and I will allow God to decide when it is time for him to go home.

The last couple of weeks have been filled with tears, heartbreak, and some bouts of anxiety, but they have also been filled to the brim with an outpouring of love from those around us. Jesus has been manifesting himself through others taking care of our family with meals, phone calls, cards, encouragement, hugs, and most of all, prayers. This is an ugly part of life...these trials...but you can choose to see the beautiful through all the ugly. Our little boy, whom we have named Thatcher Yates, has touched so many lives already. His time on earth may be brief, but he has a mighty purpose that we are all seeing unfold before our eyes. 

The risk now becomes heart failure for him before he is born. It poses both a risk to him and myself so the doctors are watching us closely. It is our deepest desire to meet this handsome boy before his time is up. Please join us in prayer that we get to meet him, hold him, and tell him how much we love him before God calls him home.

"But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, to show that the transcendent power belongs to God and not us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For while we live we are always being given up to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus may be manifested in our mortal flesh."
-2 Corinthians 4:7-11.